Quotes by Stanley Victor Paskavich

I grew up around some great philosophers: they were coal miners and cowboys born in the 1920s. They were also vets of World War II. Listen to your elders, there isn’t any better wisdom for you.

I would never appear on any television show that would have me for a guest.

It’s amazing that people actually get paid for what I’m doing on here for free.

I have my welcome mat turned around backwards so when people leave they think they’re going to a better place.

I’m afraid to see a psychiatrist about the voices in my head. She might know who they are.

I was in a department store and the clerk came up to me and said, “Do you want to lie on the couch?” I said, “You don’t have a clipboard...”

The wee little people that live in my head won’t let Gulliver go.

In the beginning the poets and philosophers taught the world to see. Then after that any form of education was no longer free.

Balding is nature’s way of getting rid of your third eye’s unibrow.